Here is simply a review of news from the Polish capital in 2030:
1. According to the "Voice of the Capital", 70% of the inhabitants of Warsaw support the pilot and investment policy of president Trzaskowski. The probe afraid the full ban on meat and dairy consumption in the capital and the narrowing of all roads and the liquidation of parking spaces. presently only electrical cars of German production can enter the centre of Warsaw.
2. As part of the run “STOP poisoners”, the Warsaw City defender stopped as many as 327 drivers, smuggling guns from those parts of Poland, where there is no full ban on meat and dairy consumption. According to the WSM Chief, there was a criminal who carried half a pig in the trunk and 100 kilograms of lubelic curd. In addition, the city defender found as many as 6 kg of cheese from Podlasie and 2 pig seals in the pockets of the juvenile delinquent's son. In accordance with the law in force in Warsaw, the city police recruited criminals' cars and sent applications to the capital prosecutor's office. We remind you that up to 10 years in prison for the speculation of robberies and dairy products!
3. The fresh communication strategy has been in place in the centre of Warsaw for a week. All roads were renamed bike paths, while bicycle paths were designed for electrical car traffic. Due to the warming of the planet, bus connections are liquidated in Warsaw, which was met with full acceptance of the inhabitants of the capital.
4. Due to the limitation of the acquisition of clothing to 3 pieces per year – the Warsaw Council determined that in 2031 it would be a hat, trousers and shirt, while women would be able to buy bras, tights and scarf. Additionally, women will be entitled to acquisition 12 pairs of panties, i.e. for months of January, February, March, April, etc..
5. president Trzaskowski arrived from North Korea at Chopin Airport. This was the 3rd visit of the president of Warsaw to North Korea this year. The experience gained by president Trzaskowski during his abroad visits is already being realised in our capital. And so on Ursynów – a large car parking lot was converted into a pasture, where the plants essential to prepare regular meals were planted by residents of this beautiful district.
6. During yesterday's action at Rosycki's Bazaar, City defender stopped six women who hid their eggs under their skirts. According to the spokesperson for the Warsaw City Guard, the detainees came from Podlasie, where most eggs and butter are smuggled into the capital. The chief epidemiologist of the capital of Ms. Marzanna U. warns that the consumption of eggs and butter may be the origin of specified diseases as heart attacks, stroke, stomach, liver and pancreas cancers as well as dizziness, threatening to lose consciousness. The epidemiologist points out that many egg-like substitutes and German motor butter are available in the Warsaw market, produced by the BMW company from high-recotified oils - which are widely appreciated by the Warsaw gourmets.
7. The large success of Warsaw's law enforcement services and city defender ended with last night's action on the milk inactive in existence in the underground. During the night raid, 21 illegal milk drinking facilities were liquidated and the “Jogurta” - the boss of the curd gang - was detained. "Jogurt" among others led an underground milk bar to which the criminal component from Prague South descended. Unfortunately, the gangster “Karkaka” is inactive elusive, bringing banned poultry and pork to the capital. It is worth noting that 430 milk addicts were detained during yesterday's roundup and were transferred to a closed rehab facility in Warsaw.
8. According to the town hall, the Warsaw Council allocated PLN half a billion in the budget for 2031 to rehabilitate people addicted to meat and dairy products. More than 100 million zlotys will cost preparing talons for clothing and setting up shops where clothes can be made. According to the commercial suggestion, there will inactive be clothing commercial stores where you can buy shoes and slippers all year round.
9. In connection with the demonstration of “Solidarity” at Warsaw City Hall, broken down by the forces, the spokesperson of Town Hall powerfully denied that there were shops “behind yellow curtains” in Warsaw offices, where the officials and officers of Town Hall could buy meat, dairy, and clothing from China. "We powerfully condemn the subversive activity of "Solidarity" and the forces known to us, which effort to destruct the long-built advancement in Warsaw, defaming the authorities of the capital, which have enjoyed the unwavering assurance of the inhabitants of the capital since the reign of HGW" said Mayor.
10. The long-awaited cricket flour, recommended by European nutritionists, appeared in the Warsaw deli. It is made of cricket bread that is characterized by crispy, chitin skin, while doughnuts are besides crispy.
11. Yesterday, at night, police stopped close the boulevard over the Vistula River, 2 suspiciously acting young men. After the arrest, the suspects admitted to eating the resin sausage, while in 1 man the police found over 100 grams of this dangerous specificity. Under the law, having over 100 grams of sausage (for its own use) is already a crime in Warsaw.
12. After 2 years of intensive investigation, the dangerous wurstofil Luke N was yet detained. The offender invited the girls and boys to his flat in Mokotów, where he offered lured young people dairy and showed them pictures of sausages and another meat products. Criminals are facing 20 years in prison.
