Blueberry which is light

– The difficulty of bearing sickness or disability of 1 associate of the household makes the senses of the another household more acute to discern the needs and to learn unconditional love. What destroys a household is simply a deficiency of love, time and bonds. These are the real murderers of families, not the child's disease," said Agnieszka and Maciej Tomiccy, this year's winners of the “Friend of Life – Silent Hero”.

How does your love communicative begin?

Maciej Tomicki: To be honest, after the first 5 minutes, I knew that Agnieszka would be the parent of my children. Later, it was only essential to implement this plan. I was a block boy, a bit of a bully and a hooligan, and Agnieszka was a good girl from the best advanced school in Poznań. I like to say it's kind of like a mesalian.

What made you think you fell in love so quickly?

MT: She is madly intelligent, immediately impressed with her knowledge. erstwhile you meet a beautiful and smart female who cooks well, wants a large household and shares the same values, then there's no point in looking for individual else. So I had to do everything I could to get the princess to marry individual like me.

We did it. You've been married for over eighteen years.

MT: And we ate a barrel of salt together. Or a fewer barrels. all day I find that I chose well due to the fact that Agnieszka is simply a large mom and wife.

Agnieszka Tomicka: I, in turn, am glad that Maciej is with me, that he is my support. In our full past of fighting for the life of Jagoda, erstwhile the psyche is occupied by fear of the child, I buried my needs. And Maciej reminds me that I'm not only a mother, I'm besides a wife. He frequently tells me he loves me, adores me, I feel like I'm crucial to him. He's besides just a liable man and a good dad.

You are the parents of 4 children: Oli, Stasia, Frank and Berries. It's parenting marked by the prenatal failure of Stasia and the berry disease.

AT: Parenting was a dream come actual for us. erstwhile we met, we were planning a large family. I've always seen myself as a mom. I wanted this love that's in me, that's pouring it on the kids.

Tell me, please, how was the pregnancy with Jagoda? erstwhile did you find out something was wrong?

MT: I knew from the beginning that it would not be easy, due to the fact that during each erstwhile pregnancy there were less or larger problems. But from the beginning, I loved Berries and Agnes. And I was afraid for everyone.

AT: In the 18th week of pregnancy, I started bleeding and had severe cramps. I was very afraid I'd have a miscarriage, but I managed to keep this pregnancy alive for a fewer more weeks. Doctors made more and more Investigations And they said they didn't see anything disturbing. But my condition got worse, I had to have blood transfusions. Eventually, the doctors besides began to fear for my life. They said Jagoda wouldn't make it. It was a hard time due to the fact that I knew there were 2 small children in the house. The worst thing about this pregnancy is truly waiting to die. Maciej and I were twenty-nine years old and we talked about where we'd be buried with Jagoda and who would take care of the another kids... In Week 24, there was a complete detachment of the placenta and pregnancy had to be resolved.

MT: No 1 is ready for this. Stress, fear and a sense of helplessness is the hardest thing for a man. I want I could do anything, and there was nothing I could do. And then I came to the conclusion that the only thing I could do was just be a support for Agnieszka and the kids. That's it. That's it.

I can't imagine what you were going through. Fear of Berries, for your own life...

AT: It was very difficult... I remember her minute of childbirth very well. I was driving down the infirmary corridor, and I knew I might be seeing God in a minute. I began to say, “Our Father”, due to the fact that I knew that nothing was left of me. It brought me large peace. I knew that God was so good that here on earth, he'd put my family's life together if I didn't have the berries...

How did you feel erstwhile you woke up?

AT: Maciej was next door. I asked if Jagoda had made it, if she had survived. And erstwhile he said that my daughter was alive, I felt an incredible sense of grace and gratitude for both of us being here. The first days and weeks were the time of specified a suspension between life and death. The blueberry fought as hard as we could, and all we could do was look at her small body and her fight for all day with us.

What diagnosis did the doctors make? What did they say?

MT: The berries at birth weighed 600 grams. erstwhile I first saw her, she was wrapped in different blankets, lying in an incubator. The doctors showed me her heel and said I could contact her with my small finger. They took her to the newborn's intensive care, put her in a line, just saved her.

After 2 or 3 weeks, Jagoda was to undergo the first operation to let her to proceed her life. erstwhile I asked the doctor what he was most afraid of, he said to me that she actually had a 5 percent chance and that we should actually say goodbye to her daughter. I leaned down to the incubator, opened the door, and prayed: “Lord God, I see that everything that is humanly possible is done, but you are in charge. You can add days to our lives, you can take them.” And then I very consciously agreed to his will. I knew that if He decided to take Jagoda home, it would be best for her. Then I decided that if God left her to us, all day would be for His glory, and the life of Jagoda we would effort to make the most beautiful as possible. We wanted her to be a witness to God's love.

Berries turned ten. Her story, Agnieszka, is written on blog and social media. You fulfill your promise to make Jagoda a witness and a light in the lives of another people.

AT: I believe that Jagoda's life is God's plan. To me, it's a communicative about how God chooses a tiny tool that for others, for the world, might seem broken and damaged... And this organ is simply a good story. All these years erstwhile I was writing the blog of Jagoda, we met quite a few people who were helped to make crucial decisions.

What do you mean?

AT: Women address me in hard moments of their lives: in a threatened pregnancy, after loss, with an adverse prenatal diagnosis. They request a conversation, a presence. And while we don't know each other, it's not crucial at a time of crisis. It's crucial to just be with someone, to spend time with them. due to the fact that sometimes in people's hearts there are questions that are afraid to ask their loved ones. Sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger. It is besides easier to say what is in the heart, to individual who has come along a akin way and who can share his experience.

Sometimes this companionship makes individual change their decision to have an abortion and decides to give birth to a kid and although initially reasoning about giving him up for adoption, yet takes this tiny life in a 100 percent, takes them home and forms a beautiful family...

I think 1 day Jagoda will take all these stories and carry them in a basket to God. Blueberry helps people break their fears, open them heart For love, it leads to many transformations and interior healings...

What does being a child’s parent with disabilities teach you?

AT: The first 2 years of her life taught us humility and patience. We learned then that we would never know the answer to the question of how much time we had left. It was Jagoda who taught us that if we do not know how much time we have, then in all minute of our lives we must give love, tell how much you love your loved ones, hug them, be next to them. due to the fact that that's all that truly matters in life.

You frequently hear that disability is the origin of the breakdown of families. You show something completely different.

AT: The difficulty of bearing illness or disability of 1 associate of the household makes the senses of the another household more acute to see the needs and to learn unconditional love. What destroys a household is simply a deficiency of love, time and bonds. These are real household killers, not kid disease.

MT: The planet frequently deceives us and tries to show us that happiness is elsewhere. People think they know everything. We have research, science, medicine, psychiatrists. And yet more and more people are unhappy... We don't request quite a few money, trips, holidays for happiness. The berries, its genuine joy, purity and interior light make all the hardships of life disappear, and its happiness is our happiness.

What do you think it means to be a friend of life?

AT: A friend of life is individual who sees opportunities and possible in another man. He sees a man and knows that life is simply a gift and a grace. specified a individual will never take a second chance, extinguish his hope, or plunge him into darkness.

MT: I would add that a friend of life besides cares about human dignity. He does not specify anyone by his weakness, sickness, or the value anyone can bring into society. The most crucial thing is not to rob another man of dignity.